<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>forever (i will hate the finale of supernatural) by needsomethingtodoworld</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27811720">forever (i will hate the finale of supernatural)</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/needsomethingtodoworld/pseuds/needsomethingtodoworld'>needsomethingtodoworld</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Supernatural</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Ending, Angst with a Happy Ending, Castiel and Dean Winchester and Sam Winchester are Jack Kline's Parents, Castiel and Dean Winchester are Claire Novak's Parents, Episode Fix-It: s15e20 Carry On, Episode Fix-it, Fix-It, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Sam Winchester Knows, how do people have so many tags im struggling, my canon now assholes, would be rated gen but i have a potty mouth</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 17:13:45</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,374</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27811720</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/needsomethingtodoworld/pseuds/needsomethingtodoworld</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>a fix it of sorts. obviously after that train wreck of a finale its something we all need. happy ending i promise. I'm bad at summaries lmao.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Castiel/Dean Winchester, Dean Winchester &amp; Sam Winchester</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>65</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>forever (i will hate the finale of supernatural)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>listen the finale was not good. i needed an ending where the queer characters didn't die and happiness wasn't only found in death. so i wrote it bc fuck the writers suck my ass andrew</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>
    <span>I love you</span>
  </em>
  <span>. The words echoed throughout Dean's mind, again and again, like waves of the ocean. Cas, his best friend, the only thing that kept him going anymore, and the angel he had hopelessly loved for years. Cas loved him back. Castiel loved Dean Winchester. Dean Winchester, a man who was only ever good at breaking things, and Dean Winchester, a man who killed everyone and everything he loved. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Of course, Cas would end up dead as well. He knew it would happen one day. He just didn't expect it to be like this. Everything Dean loved dies, and he tried to remind himself of that. He never would have guessed that the reason Cas ended up dead was that Cas loved him back. Once again proving, even if Chuck could control their will and their choices, He could not control love.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>God could not control love, but God could control how quickly he took it away. It wasn't even God this time. It was some fucking primordial being that also thought Dean didn't deserve to be happy. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>There was still a handprint on Dean's jacket. A final reminder of everything he had lost.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>"Where's Cas?" Sam ran in shouting, gesturing while Jack followed behind. He stopped dead in his tracks when he saw Dean against the wall.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>"Where's Cas?" Sam asked, a bit more gently this time. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The only thing Dean could do was shake his head and let out a sob. He no longer cared about staying strong, and he no longer cared about anything. Cas was </span>
  <em>
    <span>gone</span>
  </em>
  <span>. And he wasn't coming back this time.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>It was after they set Chuck to rest when Dean truly lost hope. The Empty was where things go, and Cas was just a </span>
  <em>
    <span>thing</span>
  </em>
  <span> in its eyes. That would have been where Chuck went, and if fucking </span>
  <em>
    <span>God</span>
  </em>
  <span> couldn't escape its clutches, well, Dean didn't want to finish the sentence. It was easy to lose hope in a world where God bleeds, after all. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>"Dean. Let's go," Sam smiled softly, pointing to the car. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>"Where?" Dean asked, not looking up from a spellbook.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>"Just come on."</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Dean sighed, but dutifully hopped into the passenger seat of the car and leaned back. They drove for a while, Dean still not knowing where they were going, and Sam taking the wheel of both of their lives for once. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>They arrived at some sort of festival an hour later. A pie festival, to be precise. The only thing Dean wanted to do was go home and search for ways to free Cas, but he knew that Sam was trying to make him feel better. So Dean decided he'd pretend everything was okay for a little while. That his heart was in one piece, and that he wasn't drowning himself in whiskey every night, thinking of every single fucking way it could have gone differently.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Dean put on a smile and pretended that he was whole. That he was happy. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>"Cherry, apple, or blueberry?" Sam asked him.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Dean shook himself out of his spiraling thoughts and replied, "Sammy, it's not that simple. You also have to take into account the crust and how it's baked, and everything else, but in the end, pie is pie." It seemed to satisfy Sam, so Dean faked another smile.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He kept seeing Cas like he did when they escaped Purgatory. If the nightmares and the last whisper of an </span>
  <em>
    <span>I love you</span>
  </em>
  <span>, didn't torture him enough, his mind made him see the echo of his lost love out of the corner of his eye, where Cas was not standing and never would stand. So he did something the pre-Cas Dean never would have done: he prayed.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>It was black. It was dark. Castiel was swimming, he was sinking, and he was drowning; drowning in every thought that crossed his mind, in every single word that almost escaped his lips. He was in The Empty, where everything he had never done came rushing over him. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>It had been torture to leave Dean, but maybe staying here wasn't so bad. He knew Dean didn't love him back in the way that Cas longed for his happiness and for them to play a part in it together. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He wanted to make a home with Dean in the bunker and practice the small things. Cas wanted to make Dean coffee in the morning and he wanted to fall asleep in each other's arms.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>At least here he could bathe in the memories and the knowledge that Dean Winchester, the man he fell for, and in love with, knew that he was loved.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Castiel wouldn't say he was happy in The Empty, as that would be against the entire point. He was content, so to say. He was okay with simply not existing for a little while. A story Dean told him, one about his mother, mentioned that he kept saying five more minutes in bed. That, Cas decided, was what he was feeling now. Five more minutes without someone to protect or someone to fight. That may have been his entire purpose as an angel, but he did occasionally get tired of not having the option to simply exist. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>While he was somewhat satisfied in The Empty, Cas couldn't stop thinking about Dean. Dean, with a smile that came out less than the sunshine, but when it did, it was brighter than the sunshine. Dean Winchester, a man who had given so much of himself to the point where he felt incomplete. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>So Cas existed for a little while. It started small at first. A nagging suspicion that something was calling his name. It grew louder, minute after minute, like a steady heartbeat growing stronger. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Cas. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>CAS.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Cas. I don't even know if you can hear me right now, and I don't know if you would even care. I want to say I'm sorry. I'm so fucking sorry for the fact that I never told you I loved you. Fuck, I hardly even admitted to myself that every time I touched you my heart fluttered, and how I could look into your eyes and find everything I've ever thought was good in the world.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>And I've gotta be honest with you right now. I'm a fucking mess. We beat Chuck. I mean we did it. It seems the one thing we can't do is get you back.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>But if you can hear me, but you can't get out from wherever you're trapped I just want you to know this: I love you, Castiel. I have loved you since god knows when, but it feels like forever and a second all in one. I love you, and I'm sorry for never acting on it. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Love was always a hard thing for me, and I'll admit it still is. But I hope you know that it was so easy to fall in love with you. It was simple logic that I had to fall so deeply in love with an angel who cared. An angel who cared about Jack, Sam, Claire, and so many others. The angel who fought for free will, and who gave so much. It was so easy to fall in love with you, and now I'll never stop. I'm sorry Cas, I'm sorry that I never told you, and I'm even sorry for you loving me. Maybe if you didn't you'd still be </span>
  </em>
  <span>here</span>
  <em>
    <span>.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The prayer seemed to strike a flame in Cas. Dean </span>
  <em>
    <span>loved </span>
  </em>
  <span>him back. He knew that Dean was worth living for, not simply existing in the dark, and now Cas had a motive: to get back to Dean. The chains of The Empty could not hold him anymore.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Dean never thought it would end like this. At least not anymore. When he was in his twenties or hell, even a year ago, he would have bet that he would have died on a hunt. Maybe that wasn't such a bad thing anymore. Death was inevitable, and why not reunite with everyone else on the other side? </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>If he had to go permanently this time, Dean thought it would have at least been a more impressive death. A nail in his stomach, in an old barn. He was going to be the laughingstock of the hunters. To them, it didn't matter how you lived, it was how you died. Wasn't that the whole point though? Did he die alone? Happily? The circumstances of death could say so much about a person, yet hardly anyone ever asked. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Dean didn't know how people would describe his death. It wasn't like it mattered to him, where he'll be going. He did let out one last word: "</span>
  <em>
    <span>Cas."</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Cas opened his eyes for what felt like the first time. The Empty, wearing his face again, smirked at him and leaned against an invisible wall.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>"So, you've woken up just to disturb me? How petty of you," It spat. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>It walked around Castiel, who was seemingly anchored by invisible chains. The Empty caught sight of the angel struggling against the unseen bounds, and It opened its mouth and said, "No, no. I won't let you get out this easily this time, Castiel. This time, you'll have to want to be freed. Also, you have to give me something in return for being so generous and letting you go." It chuckled and looked into Cas's eyes. "Tell me Castiel? Do you really want to go back?" </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Cas pondered this question and thought it through carefully. He was about to give It his final answer, but he heard Dean say his name. A short "</span>
  <em>
    <span>Cas</span>
  </em>
  <span>," that said so many different things. The echoes of his prayer pounded against all rational thought, the name Dean gave him overpowering every single path God forced upon him. And with that, he gave his final answer to The Empty.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>"</span>
  <em>
    <span>Yes</span>
  </em>
  <span>."</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Dean closed his eyes for what he thought would be the last time. He saw a bright blue light with the outline of what looked like Cas's wings from the barn all those years ago. He must be in heaven, he decided. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>"Hello, Dean." He heard a familiar voice say. Yep, definitely heaven.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Dean opened his eyes and saw the barn again, this time with Cas standing right in front of him. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>"Cas, I love-" Dean didn't even know if the man standing in front of him was real, but in the slight chance he was even real-</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>"Shhh. Save your breath. I know. I heard your prayer. Why'd you have to go and do something stupid, Dean?" Cas cradled the hunter's face carefully with his hands. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Dean changed his mind. If he had to die tonight, this was a beautiful way to go. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Cas was desperately thinking of a way to save Dean. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The fallen angel pulled at the last of his grace and kissed Dean. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>For Dean, it felt like nothing he'd ever felt before. Cas's lips were gentle and soft, and they made everything feel like it was sliding into place. The hole in his stomach, coincidentally also felt like it was closing itself up, the grace running through his body and making his body completely and wholly alive again. The feel of Cas's lips on his, however, made </span>
  <em>
    <span>Dean</span>
  </em>
  <span> feel alive again.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Everything was quiet now as the two pulled apart, now standing in the middle of the barn. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>"I think I'm human now, Dean." Cas smiled.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>An expression of worry crossed Dean's face for a minute before Cas kissed him again. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>It felt just as magical, and Dean decided he wanted it to last forever. What was life compared to them? It didn't matter what happened, as long as Cas was with him, everything would be perfect. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>"Dean, I'm going to call someone. I don't care what you think, I'm trying to save your fucking life," Sam rushed in shouting. He stopped in his tracks when he saw the two of them leaning on each other looking into each other's eyes. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>"Hiya Sammy," Dean smirked. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Sam shook his head and brought them all in for a group hug, his family between his arms. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Dean let Sam drive on the way home, and when Sam looked back in the rearview mirror, the two love birds were falling asleep against each other in the backseat. They deserved it, for everything they'd been through, together and apart. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Miracle was waiting for them when they got home. Dean got him to sit and introduced him to Cas, who happily gave him lots of pets and belly rubs.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>"Wanna talk about what happened?" Sam asked Dean when they were cooking dinner for the three of them.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>"He made it, Sammy. Fuck, we both did. Also..." he trailed off, unsure of what to say.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>"I know, Dean."</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Dean called everyone on his phone later that night, inviting them to the bunker for a little while. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Jody and Donna showed up first, along with the girls. Claire nudged Kaia and pointed at Dean and Cas leaning each other, which did not help him calm down.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>"Did you finally make a move old man?" she asked him. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Dean blushed and started rambling about something entirely different before Cas came up and hugged him from behind. "I did," he said with a grin on his face, before hugging Claire. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Charlie and Bobby were chatting in the corner, and Dean pretended not to notice Bobby discreetly passing Charlie twenty bucks after Dean kissed Cas on the cheek.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>They heard a knock on the door right after their 'we saved the world' toast, and when Dean opened up the door, Jack was standing there. Dean blinked twice and even went so far as to pinch himself before enveloping the boy into a crushing hug. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He was God now, he explained. He could still go to the bunker and do family game night, but he had a few 'responsibilities' that he also had to do sometimes. But Dean decided it no longer mattered what Jack was or how much power he had, what mattered was that he was there. With them. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>And as they laid in each other's arms, tracing over each other's scars, they decided forever. Forever they would love each other, and forever they would be happy together. </span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>i promise im not a heller im just bad at writing also if you enjoyed pls leave kudos/a comment! it would really make my day 🥺 also pls tell me if there are any mistakes! &lt;3 thank you for reading!</p></blockquote></div></div>
</body>
</html>